a little "ing" over here

Growing~ these beautiful little zinnias in my backyard right now. Love them!


Baking~ crock pot bread right now... I'm still undecided about it. However, the recipes from this book are wonderful.  I made a huge batch of dough and it lasts up to ten days.  So whenever I've wanted fresh bread I just break off a grapefruit-sized chunk and bake it as needed.  I love not having to go through the whole process all. over. again. just to get bread.  Let's face it, I am not a fan of dishes.  There I said it.

Dreaming~ a lot recently of how I can further develop my gifts and dreams to be a contributor to God's work while still staying at home.  And 99% of God's work in my life right now IS staying home and being here.  But I've been dreaming a lot about people who could possibly come through our doors, hands wrapped around coffee mugs, hearts shared, prayers whispered and promises claimed.  Oooo I get so excited thinking about my dreams.

Pushing~ myself to finish a gift that has sat 85% finished for a month.  True, it took a haitus for my girls' birthday party prep (and Harry Potter) but now that those have passed I really need to finish up and send the lovely gift.

Challenging~ myself to workout more this upcoming month and finally! lose the baby weight (so I can put on some more! did i just write that out loud on my blog?)! Well, don't get your hopes up! While Hubs and I do talk of another baby we are definitely not "there" yet.

Traveling~ vicariously through all my friends. I have two friends in Paris this week. Friends in Hawaii and of course the views of London on my television screen are all so enticing... If I could pick up and go... I don't know where I would choose though! Do you have a destination you've been dreaming about?

Tasting~ garlic.  I homemade some dressing and got a little crazy with fresh herbs and garlic and now I have uber-bad breath! That's okay, right? It just means it's flavorful!

Watching~ a lot of cooking shows recently.  I heart Gordon Ramsey.  There! I said it.  I can't help it. He's vulgur and really mean but I am drawn to him like a moth to one of those zappy bug lights.  GoooorddddooooZAP!  I don't really know what that means and it's kind of weird to read it but I'm leaving it cause this is turning into true confessions.  The tv show CHOPPED has me looking outside my comfort zone for new flavors and ways to create dishes I like (hence the above) and Ramsey's shows are just downright entertaining! Me gusta! Daisuki!

Leaving~ now to hang out with the Love Bugs.

Love!

motherhood mystery #342

#342~ Love Bugs rejecting the food I've served them, throwing said food on the floor then proceeding to eat same said food once I've let them out and about.  Note to self: maybe serving food on the floor will enable Love Bugs to eat more?

little bits of me

There is something so sweet about my daughters' chubby hands.  I love to press down on their knuckles where the sweet chubbiness leaves a bit of an imprint.

I love to kiss their faces.  I love to tickle their nose with wispy strands of my already greying hair.  Their widening eyes as they track the path of a bird or a plane or fluff floating in the air.

I heard it said that children are your heart, running around outside of your body and I believe it.  These are my flesh, my bone, my dreams come true with breath of Life breathed into them and there is something so beautiful about their little noises.

We go in almost every night to look at them and sometimes they wake. Then we kick ourselves for disturbing their slumber and promise we won't do it again but the next night beckons, calls and teases us till we give in and go peek at them again.  We can't stand it.

I giggle and laugh on the ground looking at clouds. I snuggle and hold them tight to my body.  They're warm and soft and smell so sweet.  Sometimes they smell like the leftovers of lunch that they smushed in their hair but even that is so sweet.  It's tender.

They are tender. And they are mine.  My little hearts crawling, standing, daring to walk across to open arms.

My arms will always be open to welcome, to console, to hold these bits of me out here in the world.

Sweet tender little bits of me and my love that we just can't seem to get enough of their joyful existence.  They are His great gift to us and we rejoice!

After all, isn't that what my name means? And so I must do.

eating with spoons

Right now we're learning to eat with spoons...

Mommy said it would be hard but it wasn't that hard to do...

See? Not hard at all! I told my Mommy that we would do our very best and not spill anywhere.  I said, "Look, Mommy! This may be our first time but we're not going to resort to caveman like tactics.  We'll starve before we mess up our beautiful little bodies!"

Right Belle?

Belle?

Belle? What are you doing?

Hmmm... that kind of looks like fun! 

Well, like I said, we are just learning...

Look Li Li, I'm using my spoon too!

cute but not so

Awww... how cute!

The girls have started something recently that I find kind of cute even though I know I shouldn't.  When the girls don't like something we give them to eat they usually throw it off the side of their chairs onto the floor.  We can see it coming so we try to stop it by telling them firmly "no" and they, for the most part, understand it.

But for the past few days after we tell them "no" they've started raising their hands to their mouths, as if they are eating whatever they were about to discard, and then stuff it down by their laps.

Cute... but not really!

I know discipline is for the best because of what the Word says, for the Lord disciplines the one He loves (Hebrews 12:6a) but I think this is rather clever of the girls.  I probably shouldn't be too impressed, this may mean a lifetime of clever disobedience from these two but at least for now we "discipline" in a way that is appropriate.

Wow, development is such an amazing process!! I love watching these two grow and learning through their eyes as they discover life.

babies... er, little girls

It's hard to believe I've been a mother of twinkies for a whole year. The days at times did drag by (what? I'm just being honest) but then in a blink of an eye, they were no longer "newborns" or even babies for that matter.
I read an article that said babies become toddlers either when they start walking OR when they turn one.  The debate is still out on that one.  Either way, there is no use calling them babies anymore.  Especially now as they've started referring to other things as "babies"... and when I say "things" I do sincerely mean things. Just about anything can be a baby these days.
They love saying "mama" "dada" and "baby".  Belle loves making a "mmm" sound when we ask her what a cow says and yes, she still makes the "roaring" of a lion sound when we ask.  Li Li on the other hand loves to "spit" or stick her tongue out whenever we ask her anything.  So we've started asking her what an elephant says and it's just about spot on with how she sounds.
They are HAPPY babies and GOOD babies.  Oops, I mean little girls. They're wonderful and hilarious.  They LOVE playing peek-a-boo, their daddy, being read to and each other more than any other thing in the world.  They love peas, apple juice and chinese food (seriously!).  They're wonderful babies... er, I mean little girls.

We celebrated their birthday by going to the aquarium

and eating apple fritters

opening presents

eating cupcakes,

and of course a party in the park!

Yay for turning one!

the 4th (from a Love Bugs perspective)

We had a wonderful 4th of July. Despite the weather being yucky, we managed to have a full day of fun!

Our 4th of July "sparklers"

Even my baby carrier matched my red, white and blue outfit!

I think babies make the best accessories, don't you?!

Mommy's fun new dip. Thank you pinterest for leading her to this dip found here.

Even though she said we were too young this year to try some.

Playing

With Daddy

Enjoying the sunshine with Mommy

All in all, our first 4th was a huge hit! 

...and we even got to go to bed a little late. Woo hoo for breaking the bedtime routine!

an old camp secret

Did you go to summer camp? I did! I loved summer camp. Every year we'd drive and drive and drive until we reached the "Star" which was the sign on the road marking where to turn in to get to camp.  Since I started going to camp before I could read (compliments of begin a pastor's kid... and a camp going pastor no doubt!) I knew that star before I knew how to spell my own name.

Oh beloved camp!

What I took were friendships mostly but some lessons have stuck with me.

For instance, when swimming it's always good to have a "buddy"...

and other lessons and songs. Oh, the songs we used to sing around the campfire. I sang a lot of those songs when I was sleep deprived and trying to find some way to connect with God in the early days of my Love Bugs' lives.  I was clinging to the shred of hope and childlike faith that I remembered having at one point and singing songs from those days helped me.

Among the lessons I learned is a tool on prayer.

I learned this from my counselor and besides the camp songs being a favorite I deeply admired and loved my counselors. Oh, how i loved my counselors. When people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up "counselor" was in the top 3.  I never had any sisters growing up so camp counselors were my week of a glimpse into what having a teenaged sister was like. Man, did I love them! And man did they usually love my older brothers.

Ha! So I was naturally a favorite!

Anyway, I learned this from a camp counselor and have been doing it off and on ever since. Isn't that awesome?! I wish I remembered her name because I would tell her, "Look! You changed my life and helped me! Also, I'm sorry I made you share your bed when it was thundering! I'm sure you didn't get any sleep and were quite cranky that next day!"

First take a blank sheet of paper.  This one is a little smaller than I usually use but it's just to be used as an example anyway!

Then make lines.  I teeter between being a perfectionist and not.  So half my lines are straight and half are squiggly.  You can free hand this. No biggie!

go all the way down your sheet of paper...

then go the other way making a grid.

the top line is for the days of the week and I am terribly sorry for Wednesday because that is not a lot of room. at. all.

I bet you didn't know but the line right below the days of the week is a special line. Oo la la! So highlight it or use a marker or do something fancy to it. 

Then you add in names.

Now the top line of names that is special are the people or things that you want to pray for EVERY week.  Then below it are the people or things you want to pray for once in awhile.  So every Monday I pray for Hubs then I pray for whoever has the first line the first week, second line second week, etc.

Make sense?

I didn't finish filling this out because I already have mine made and while it's not totally private it's also not something I'd share willy nilly on the internet.  So if you want to see what a filled out one looks like, let me know and I'll email you a picture. Seriously, though, it's a bunch of names all the way down.

The thing I like about this is that it helps me stay pretty consistent with prayer.  The thing I don't like about it is I don't always remember to pray for things that come up suddenly. BUT you could have a day of the week where you pray for "current" needs for family, friends and yourself.

I might need to add a "current" square to my prayer sheet.

There you have it.

A lesson learned (among many) from my camp days!

real people live here

All I could think of when I saw this nectarine was, "this is some real fruit".  And I couldn't help but appreciate the fruit from farmers markets.  It's flawed, its dented, it looks kind of gross but it's real. It's not manufactured or grown in a factory field.  It's real.

And that's how I want my home to be. Real.  We're gonna make mistakes, we're gonna let our kids climb trees only to have them fall out and break their arms. I'm gonna say things and forget to hold my tongue.  I'm gonna "dent" Hubs and he's gonna "dent" me.  My kids will fight (darn) and I'm gonna lose my patience.  We're gonna look at each other and realize that we're bruised, dented, gross looking fruit.  I'll probably think Hubs and my Love Bugs are more dented than me... but that's the plank in my eye talking.

I wish I could avoid all of this but we're human and humans make mistakes.

I tend to be one of those humans who makes many mistakes and very blatantly because I'm so "over-the-top" loud and expressive.  I remember in college thinking that it must be so nice to sin "in quiet" instead of how I usually sinned... right out there in front of everyone.  Now I sin "in quiet" and I realize its just as bad if not worse... because there is no accountability should I choose not to ask for it.

So I saw this fruit, realized how perfectly delicious it was despite its appearance and realized that I want my home to be a place where "real people live"... meaning that our home has to be a home to grace and love... we have to know that dents and bruises *will* happen but God still wants to use us and love us despite our nasty appearances.  My home is a home where dents can be forgiven and healed, where bruises are given a rest and long deep breaths are taken.  I don't want some manufactured home with people who seem like they have it all together.  I want a place where we are free to make mistakes and then pick each other back up and keep trekking together.

My home has to be a real place for real people... cause if it's not it ain't gonna work.

real business

"The real business of your life as a saved soul is intercessory prayer.  Wherever God puts you in circumstances, pray immediately, pray that His Atonement may be realized in others lives as it has been in yours.  Pray for your friends now; pray for those with whom you come in contact with now."

Oswald Chambers "My Utmost for His Highest (June 20)"

Too often I get confused by my "real business"... what is my job, my passion, my direction in life?  And too often my business becomes about doing and convincing and pushing.... and not allowing and abiding.  Hardly anyone likes to sit and just let life happen.

We worry that should we sit too long we'll never find the motivation to leave our plush seats.  Soon we'll find that we have taken on the characteristics of the comfy chairs we have sat in. We become plush and comfy and inactive just like our chairs.

So the pendulum swings the other way and we reject the comfy chair and we get busy doing life.  We do life at fast pace.  We "catch" our breath when we sleep and we enjoy each other through social networks.  How often have I "caught up" with a good friend by looking at her pictures on Facebook? "Oh! You went to Europe? Looks like a great trip." I never even communicate to said friend I let my fingertips and eyeballs do the communicating while never actually inconveniencing myself.  Can't look at all the pictures? No problem, I'll just pick and choose what happens to be easiest for me.

So we're in a bind.  Either we become comfy couches snuggled under our blankets of "relaxing" or we become a social piranhas with 700 friends and no one near to talk to.

Don't get me wrong, I like relaxing.  I consider 7:05PM "my time" after the Love Bugs have gone to bed and 99% of the time end up on the couch.  It's wonderful and restful.  Sometimes "my time" ends up connecting with long distance friends through Facebook.  Now that my friends are having babies and working full time hours, I feel guilty calling late at night because of the time differences.  So hear me out, I like relaxing and I like Facebook, Pinterest, etc.

But what I really like were Oswald's thoughts above because it struck me as the perfect chord played in a harmony of connecting & abiding.  When we stop to pray for someone we are connecting with them in a higher sense than we could ever hope to connect via Facebook.  A true test of friendship is whether I am willing to get on my knees and offer up prayer on behalf of that person.

It's also abiding in the Lord because we are talking to Him and hearing from Him. Too often I take to the Lord my issues and then sign off and get on my way.  But I need to learn to hear from God.  I've heard it said that you can hear from God in the midst of chaos.  Which is good because my life can be chaotic.  As I write this I stare at the mess of a lifetime mocking me from behind.  I literally step-slid in avocado chunks to get to the computer to write this. Lord, speak to me in the chaos!

Now, don't take that as your excuse to make your life chaotic but take heart if you can't help but feel like you're treading water in life right now.  When God gives you slow seasons, take them, wallow in them, enjoy them... sit at a coffeeshop and read. read. READ. But then when God gives you busy seasons and messy avocado seasons, enjoy those and as you're tiptoeing around the crazy mess you call life still ABIDE. Pray and give thanks!  The cool thing about praying is that it can be done anywhere at anytime by anyone. Awesome! Changing diapers? Pray! Alone with the Word at a coffeeshop? Pray! Listening to screaming kids? Pray! Lunch with a friend? Pray!

Wherever you are in life, don't underestimate the ability of prayer. 

"do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God" Philippians 4:6

"be constant in prayer" Romans 12:12

"pray without ceasing" 1 Thessalonians 5:17

10 & 11

I'm sorry I haven't posted anything about the Love Bugs recently.

I haven't been consistent in my posts on their growth and I really wanted to be able to track them this whole year. However we had some hiccups in the past two months of pictures so the following will have to do. :)

Here's the ten month shot! I can't believe the girls are so close to a year! They are such precious little babes.  

Li Li aka "Lils" is getting so active.  She used to follow in her sister's footsteps but recently has started to lead her own way.  She's so close to walking! She loves sucking her thumb, playing with buttons, throwing her head back to laugh, and standing up.

Belle is right behind her sister in progress.  She will not be overshadowed.  She loves to feed herself and will even spit something out that I have fed her to put it in herself.  Her Grampa was the one who discovered what she was doing when she does this.  It's cute.  She loves to drink from her sippy cup but tries to spit out her drink ... this leads to a very very wet shirt on our little Love Bug. She is usually the quicker one to smile and give her affections to new people.  I think I have a social Love Bug on my hand with her.

Lils is just as affectionate but is particular about who she shares her love with.  If you can win Lils heart you've made a friend for life.

The closest picture I could get at 11 months with "Aslan"... 

The girls are sleeping well at night, they travel well and are just a delight to all who meet them.  They eat "regular" food just as long as it is cut up in small bite size pieces!

I love being a twins mommy! It's probably one of my favorite "hats" that I wear in life.  Don't get me wrong, it's hard but it is a delight too.  I am always laughing at my Love Bugs and discovering life through their eyes.

Can't believe it's almost a year. It really gets better and better with each new season.

a tour...

Hello everyone!

I wanted to write and give a little tour of my blog so that if you are here and confused, you won't feel so unsure of navigating the pages, links, etc.

First off, is the "pages area"... If you click on any of the pages you will be redirected to those posts which can tell you a bit more about me and the series of Moms in Ministry.  I wanted to add the M.I.M. links in case someone was trying to find them all in one location. Voila! The pages section!

Next, we have the categories or "tags" from my post.  Hubs has told me in recent feedback that he thinks these are confusing.  For now, I'll just let you know what each tag means and hope that might clear up some confusion.


Inklings
This is where I share my deep thoughts and meanderings through life.  It's lovingly stolen from the literary group with the same name that met in pubs to discuss their own writings.  Members included my hero C.S. Lewis, fictional genius J.R.R. Tolkien and mystery phenomenon Dorothy Sayers.  Click here for more.

Home & Heart
I tag this when I write about things dear to my heart pertaining to the home.


Upward & Onward
Another Lewis reference.  In the book, "The Last Battle" those who have ventured into Aslan's Country to "move higher up and further in" or as I have taken the meaning to be "deeper into Aslan"... it's kind of my "battle cry" for God's spirit working in me and revealing things to me.


My Colorful World
Any post I consider colorful. Mostly pictures!


Over & About
My posts regarding Japan; either while in Japan or upon returning home and reflecting on my time spent there.


Life's Little Moments
Sometimes I write about the littlest things... laundry, baby moments, etc.  The little moments that if I weren't looking out for, might slip by and go unnoticed (and often do).


twenty.eight
When I was 28, I attempted to do 28 things.  And then I got pregnant (which was one of them) and did about 5. ha ha ha!! It's a list of things I gathered from myself, Hubs and family members encouraging me to do more.  I love the things I learned from the stuff I did do and let it serve as a reminder to continue trying new things.

If you look below that you'll find, Looking For Something... perhaps something you read on my blog? Enter a couple keywords here and hit search!

Then there are the blogs I love to read and people I Am Blessed to know.  If you like things you read here on Cultivating, you will love some of these.  They update and change order as the author updates their posts!

Finally, Subscribe so you can get updated when I update the blog. Since I've readily confused to being a sporadic blogger (oops, sorry!) I think this would be the easiest way to stay tuned in to read Cultivating.

Grab My Button! If you have a blog, go ahead and grab my button so you can let others know where to find me.  It's convenient, practical and just so darn cute!


Well, hope that helps you find what you might be looking for here at Cultivating and if not, don't hesitate to leave a comment below and let me know.
With love!

sporadic

Sooo... I have been MIA for awhile.  I'm sorry to not be very consistent on this blog.  Is there anyone still out there?  I sure hope so.  I read a blog about writing blogs (ha!) and it said that one of the keys to having a successful blog is consistency.  So I'm sorry if my sporadic posting is annoying you or keeping you from wanting to read my blog.

I happen to love this little blog and although I think of it often, I can only find time to give it loving attention in sporadic moments.  Sorry little blog.  Don't be offended. I still love you.

Now that we have that out of the way I wanted to show you why I wasn't able to able to write very often.  Hubs and I had an extended stay with family.... and now, let the photo bombing begin. Enjoy!

We enjoyed snacks with our cousins! 

Swing rides with family!! 

Both Love Bugs learned to climb the stairs! 

We went swimming in a fun river! 

Although some of us enjoyed it more than others!

 We battled an ear infection by snuggling!

We worked on our table manners!

We got ready for mountain climbing... this trip diaper boxes! Next trip, 14ers with Grampa!! 

 We were invited to lots of parties!

But although we had a lot of fun, there was a lot of work to do, too! 

Whenever we got an owie, we had our cousin to help us. She is really good at getting splinters out! No joke! 

We had some piano lessons!

We love Colorado! 

"Goodbye! So long! See you again soon!"

So you see? We were super busy enjoying a wonderful stay with family.  Too many pictures to post now but maybe over time I can share more!  What a blessing it is to have family so close.  Only a two hour plane ride.  After living overseas I will never complain about domestic flights again.  Thank you Lord for allowing us this trip!

Thanks to our family for letting us stay in their homes!!

And I promise to post here more often, if even sporadically!