the end (31)

August 31st
The simplicity challenge has had its ups and downs.
I've found that making charts and filling a binder full of great ideas doesn't make me an organized, productive person.  It just means I know how to work the printer.

Here's the overall finished product of trying to simplify life and gain some discipline;
*I rose earlier than usual.  I tried to get up every day before my family so that I could have a quiet time, check email and get organized before the rush of day.  I did fairly well in this area, praise the Lord.  I really REALLY enjoyed getting up (honestly) early.  It was wonderful to have a quiet house to myself. Sure there were days (like today) where I couldn't peel myself out of bed.  But overall, getting up early was a good habit to start and continue into September.

*I engaged with my neighbors a bit more.  Not a whole lot but I tried to stop and have conversations with them instead of passing greetings flung through the air.

*Exercise is always an area where I can grow but I've managed to get a little better and even a small step is a step.

*It was hard to stay on budget... must be better at this.

*Cleaning... hmmm... yeah, this is also an area where I can grow and be more disciplined.

I have learned that I do a good job cleaning when I have friends over.  So I would take care of cleaning and engaging my neighbors if I had them over more often.  Must think seriously about this.

It's been a good month.  Simplicity is never something I will attain in life but I can always try.

What about you? Have you learned anything on your own quest to simplicity?  Any tips or tricks to pass on to the rest of us?

a slight obsession

I love fall.  I have what some may consider a slight obsession with fall but I consider it a healthy admiration for the best season of all.  Don't get me wrong, I like the other seasons.  Winter is fun for snowboarding, spring for flowers & warming us all up again and then summer... well, don't get me started on all the fun things about summer.

But nothing comes close to fall.  Fall is when all my favorite things in the world happen.  The weather starts to cool down, nights become longer, football season, pumpkin spice lattes, jeans come out of closets, snuggling with a cup of hot apple cider or cocoa or coffee or tea... everything just seems to take a long deep inward breath and a slow exhale as it was usually panting and sweating during summer... now, in fall, we can relax.

I love fall.  I love everything about fall.  I love the changing of leaves. I love the crispness in the air. I love that I can wear my favorite thing in the world, jeans and not be sweltering by ten in the morning. I also happen to love beanies.  And yes, I know people wear beanies in all seasons but I'm just not a fan of beanies unless it's a proper temperature outside and I'm guaranteed to not have a sweaty neck.

Fall is the reward we get for not melting during the summer.

Even foods taste better in the fall.  Bountiful harvests start to reappear in the fall.  Apples, pumpkins, tomatoes... and so much more.  So. Much!

I love back to school. I don't even go to school but there's just such an excitement in the air.  I'm all about the new beginnings and possibilities of these beginnings.  The daydreaming is finally starting to bear some fruit and the fruit soon to be ready to harvest.

Don't you remember the excitement of the first day of school? Seeing old friends after a summer apart, making new friends, discovering new classes & the excitement about which ones will be a thrill and which will be a bore.  Cracking open new (used) books.... I get such a rush from thinking about fall.  Yesterday I pushed my babies in a stroller up and down a Staples aisle looking at school products and had the sappiest grin on my face.  I love fall.

And of course, how could I forget to mention the Friday night/Saturday morning rush of a football game... did I mention football?  Well, it's in my top five of fall loves~ along with jeans & pumpkin spice lattes!

For several birthdays I had friends around the world celebrate at a certain time with drinking pumpkin spice lattes and toasting to my good health! It was a fun fall way to connect with people that I love.  See the first year here and second year here and then for some reason I stopped.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe that needs to change? "Meeting" for coffee is such a great way to connect with friends... even long distance friends. And coffee tastes better in fall.  See? It all leads back to fall.

Football, friends, leaves, beauty... I love fall.

And while its true that I live in Southern California where the leaves won't turn till January and we don't have a football team at our nearby school and the "crisp" of our weather is a chilly 68 degrees~ I still long for and love the call of a good old fashioned fall.

I'm off to go google the closest place for hay bale rides.

hear ye, hear ye

I think we need to make more announcements with the calling out of "hear ye! hear ye!".  It seems to bring people together...

and here's something you'll really want to gather round for and sink your teeth in to. Literally.

I found this website through a friend and am hooked.  I am in love. I am making promises to this site that I can't keep but I can't help it.  They just keep coming out of my mouth like I'm a 13 year old in love for the first time.  Okay, that's not true.  But if you visit this blog you'll see why I'm head over heels in love.  A healthy & tasty & not full of "where do I get that ingredients?"... I love cooking healthy but sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the different hip terms that I am so not in tune with. You with me?

That's okay! This chica is not like that. She'll hold your hand, rock you to sleep and sing "Soft Kitty" to you if you get hurt.  Okay, that's not true either.  But she does make cooking light and healthy easy!

With all that said.  Please eat these delicious morsels, ignore the fact that I used christmas sprinkles and go over to Skinny Taste for the recipe*.

Love!

*the recipe calls for "whole wheat pastry flour"... there are several options for substituting found here (it's easy!).

(Day 14) Never a Mistake

This may look like an ordinary journal and it really is just that.
Ordinary.
My best friend Kelli had this exact journal when I went to visit her in the Spring of 2010 and when I saw it I was immediately in love with it.  I don't know what struck me with this particular journal.  I blame it partially on Kel whose handwriting is so lovely and such an old friend to me that I was probably enchanted mostly with her penmanship moreso than the actual book.

I bought one, and promptly started using it.  About ten pages into the book I realized, "ohmy! this is going to take forever to fill up and I'll be stuck with this ugly old book forever"... I love journals, I love new journals, I love colorful fun and exciting journals.  So what I was doing with a black journal I have no idea.  Again I (partially) blame Kel's beautiful handwriting and use of colorful pens.  Darn you pinks, blues and greens.  You get me every time.

Anyway, not only do I love new journals but I also highly value "change and variety" as has been proven by a test the Navigators give me and proven true by the fact I change the layout of my apartment about six times a year (I painted my bedroom yesterday but more to come on that later).

Well, the black, ordinary (cough* boring) journal has won me over after all this time.  It has been WONDERFUL to go back through talks I heard and journaled on, encouraging receipts from time spent with friends and going back two years worth of writing to see in one book what God has done in this time.

Today I was thinking about Oswald Chambers' writing on letting the Lord have His way with you, admonishing and chastising you... and that reminded me of a talk I heard about Lila Trotman who was quoted as saying, "Pray that God will make you a woman of His, no matter the cost"... so I went back to see that talk and to reflect on it (two years ago September) when I stumbled on the poem that Lila was reading when Daws, her husband died, "He Maketh No Mistake".

I wanted to include it here to encourage you all (and myself) that no matter what we are facing, God never makes a mistake.

My Father's way may twist and turn

My heart may throb and ache

But in my soul I am glad to know,

He maketh no mistake.

My cherished plans may go astray,

My hopes may fade away,

But still I'll trust my Lord to lead,

for He doth know the way.

Tho' night be dark and it may seem,

that day will never break,

I'll pin my faith, my all, in Him,

He maketh no mistake.

There's so much now I cannot see,

my eyesight far too dim,

but come what may,

I'll simply trust and leave it all to Him.

For by and by the mist will lift, 

and plain it all He'll make,

Through all the way, tho' dark to me

He made not one mistake.

~A.M. Overton, 1932

And while this "Amish Challenge" has been good to give me discipline and simplify life, I don't want to confuse "doing" with "abiding".  This poem was good to remind me that at the heart of simplicity is trust and that trust is always "worth it" because of the One we put our trust in.

If you're in a tight place now or just feeling low, I pray that it will encourage you to know that God knows what He is doing.

this moment

God's timing in life is confusing.  I don't mean that in a shake your fist at the sky kind of way.  I mean that in a genuine, what is going on, kind of way.

I've been praying for a certain thing this past spring only to see it arrive in February and bear some pretty awesome fruit.  Then it was taken away.

This wasn't a necessarily bad thing that I wanted... it is a very good thing.  So I don't know why it is being taken away but it is.

And I'm sad. But not angry sad.  Just sad.

I feel like I'm at the beginning of something... or does the end just feel like a new beginning? I don't know.  But I feel expectant and excited and confused.  I had my eyes on this "thing" and now that it's gone I feel a bit like I'm looking around for something to swoop in to replace it.

But I am not sure God is going to do that.  It seems that perhaps He wants me to turn to Him and replace this wonderfulness with something Best of all.

Two times that I can remember God has done this... at the end of something excellent and good He seems to say, "You were excited about something but I want you to be excited about Me."

It's not bad to like things and to want things and to have things... it's not bad to enjoy life, to have deep friendships, a husband/wife or children.... it's not bad to desire and to yearn for gifts from God.  In fact, the bible says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life" (Proverbs 13:12) but it also warns us not to become too attached to the gift, taking our eyes off the Giver of those good gifts (See Romans 1:25).

I don't think there was anything wrong with my gift.  It was wonderful, it brought me a lot of joy and I was able to express myself through this gift.  But God gives and He takes away (Job 1:21) and this is something He has seen fit to take away.

Who am I to argue or complain? To ask God, "Why did you take this tree away from me? It provided me comfort!" (Jonah 4).

No, in this season of not understanding what God is doing and just making a conscious decision to trust and obey, I know that it may not make sense, but that doesn't mean it's not good.

I love Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.

There's always purpose.

(Day 06) Lessons Learned

I've already learned some lessons from the Simplicity Challenge I am embarking on this month.  For example, it was brutal getting up on Day 3 (Friday).  I seriously had trouble getting out of bed and even laid back down on the couch after an hour and a half.  My Love Bugs weren't awake yet (they slept in!) and I hadn't gotten my act together to make coffee the night before and couldn't make it in the morning because I am always afraid the grinder will wake the girls up, so I was running low on stamina that morning.

I realized sometimes the best things in life are the hardest things.

I've learned that I clean my house hoping for some acknowledgment from Hubs.  "Um, excuse me! Did you notice that shower was wiped clean before using it? Shall we take a moment to smile at our faces glistening in the wood floors?" And Hubs, if you read this, I'm not asking for acknowledgment really.  I just realized its a big motivator for what I do.  I want someone to notice how awesome I am becoming (which considering how awesome I started out at is mind blowing... ah, I am SO humble) and thank me for my hard work.

I realized the "amish" life is a life behind the scenes.

I've learned that saying I'll do something later usually means I won't do it.  I slept in this weekend because I felt like I had earned it and really I was running low on steam (see above about Friday).  Now, in the Amish Challenge's defense... getting up early isn't what is making me tired, it's more the discipline of setting an earlier bedtime that was making me a tad bit cranky and sleepy.  Anyway, so I slept in and said, "I'll work out and have my quiet time later in the day during the girls' naps."  I did neither.  Both days.  I think I had half a quiet time on Sunday... but I can't remember.  The truth is that once my day "starts" I'm busy thinking of my projects and to-do's to sit and read or really enjoy myself. So I think I'll consider the weekends just part of the week. :)

I realized I like rewards.  Gotta find something other than sleep. :)

So what motivates me? What gets me out of bed, cleaning behind the scenes, and doing things now instead of later?

Honestly, my alarm. And then I have accountability.  I'm still looking for others to join me here and I've signed up to be a part of Hello Mornings over there.

Hello Mornings is a place where women are gathering across the globe, committed to rising early (even 5 minutes early) to spend time with Jesus, exercise, and plan their day.  I love this challenge because it's full of grace (this is actually my third time attempting it.... third times the charm, right?), full of ideas for getting up & moving, and it's full of women who struggle & triumph at the same things.

Right now accountability is what is getting me out of bed, but I'm hoping to find some more things that get me going.  What about for you? Do you have an early morning schedule?

Day 01

You may not know this but I have a quiet admiration for our friends, the Amish.  I am quite taken with their way of life.  Or at least what I have observed of it.  The other day I was trying to figure out what is so fascinating about the Amish and I came up with some thoughts.  They are simple people, who work hard and have a disciplined lifestyle.  They're also intentional about passing on to the next generations and within themselves their tools and crafts.  They're pretty intentional within their community.  These thoughts led me to my own epiphany of "I don't have to be Amish to live this way" which is a good thought because although I've asked, Hubs is not interested in trading in his IPhone for a horse and buggy (insert sad face here).

Did I let that stop me though?  Not a chance!  I came up with my own plan of action and decided that August 1st was a great day to start my Amish Challenge. :)  I wanted to name it such but didn't want to happen on the chance that someone would read this out of context and be offended.  So instead I am naming the next 31 days,

*ta da*

The reason I am putting this on my blog is NOT to boast.  No way! I want to put it "out there" so that I can have some accountability (bring it on!) and share some resources of what worked, what didn't, how I triumphed and how I failed. :)  If something I say here can encourage or challenge one more person than that's just a cherry on top of my already delicious sundae.  I'm doing this for me, but if I can get some people to come alongside and join me? Well, the more the merrier!  Let me know if you start your own challenge!

Here's my game plan and resources that I'm starting:
*I'm rising early.  Every day, weekends and week days I'm going to try and rise before my family so that I can get some time in the Word, work-out OR just get organized for the day.  My resource for this is: Inspired to Action: Hello Mornings! Check out this website for the Fall Challenge!

*Staying on budget (do the Amish have credit cards? I don't want to assume they don't, but I kind of doubt it.)  I have trouble with this.  Guess what's the worst spender? Dining Out! Yikes! We use this but as I spend I forget to check the budget.

*Cook more at home... i love to cook but since having babies it's just so much easier to hop in the car and eat out.  No cooking, no dishes, no mess to clean up.  Wow, I'm lazy.  So this month I am severely cutting back on my eating out habits.  Hubs and I have come up with a game plan to limit our budge on this! I've come up with 30 meals that are our "staples" so that way when I am lacking in creativity in the kitchen, I can just go to a familiar face on our dinner table and know that it will be a success!

*Exercise daily in some way; gym, swimming at the pool, or walking with the stroller. Get out and get moving! One resource found here (thanks K).

*Maximize time spent with neighbors and my friends in the community vs. minimizing my time spent on my IPhone and computer.

*Cleaning Schedule (resource found here and gonna give it a whirl)

Okay, so now you're probably thinking... is this really an Amish lifestyle? Running? Using the internet for community and accountability?  So no, it isn't adapting a total Amish lifestyle but I'm trying to use my admiration for them to be a catalyst for change in my life.  The reason I admire them is because they seem to succeed in life where I falter.  So don't judge me if you see me driving, talking on my cell phone, or wearing jeans... I'm just adapting parts of their lifestyle into my life.

And without further ado. Let's begin....

Let me know if you see some flaws in my plan, if you love my plan, or if you just think I'm plain nuts.  I would love to hear from you and know if you have your own plan of action for structure set up!  

a little "ing" over here

Growing~ these beautiful little zinnias in my backyard right now. Love them!


Baking~ crock pot bread right now... I'm still undecided about it. However, the recipes from this book are wonderful.  I made a huge batch of dough and it lasts up to ten days.  So whenever I've wanted fresh bread I just break off a grapefruit-sized chunk and bake it as needed.  I love not having to go through the whole process all. over. again. just to get bread.  Let's face it, I am not a fan of dishes.  There I said it.

Dreaming~ a lot recently of how I can further develop my gifts and dreams to be a contributor to God's work while still staying at home.  And 99% of God's work in my life right now IS staying home and being here.  But I've been dreaming a lot about people who could possibly come through our doors, hands wrapped around coffee mugs, hearts shared, prayers whispered and promises claimed.  Oooo I get so excited thinking about my dreams.

Pushing~ myself to finish a gift that has sat 85% finished for a month.  True, it took a haitus for my girls' birthday party prep (and Harry Potter) but now that those have passed I really need to finish up and send the lovely gift.

Challenging~ myself to workout more this upcoming month and finally! lose the baby weight (so I can put on some more! did i just write that out loud on my blog?)! Well, don't get your hopes up! While Hubs and I do talk of another baby we are definitely not "there" yet.

Traveling~ vicariously through all my friends. I have two friends in Paris this week. Friends in Hawaii and of course the views of London on my television screen are all so enticing... If I could pick up and go... I don't know where I would choose though! Do you have a destination you've been dreaming about?

Tasting~ garlic.  I homemade some dressing and got a little crazy with fresh herbs and garlic and now I have uber-bad breath! That's okay, right? It just means it's flavorful!

Watching~ a lot of cooking shows recently.  I heart Gordon Ramsey.  There! I said it.  I can't help it. He's vulgur and really mean but I am drawn to him like a moth to one of those zappy bug lights.  GoooorddddooooZAP!  I don't really know what that means and it's kind of weird to read it but I'm leaving it cause this is turning into true confessions.  The tv show CHOPPED has me looking outside my comfort zone for new flavors and ways to create dishes I like (hence the above) and Ramsey's shows are just downright entertaining! Me gusta! Daisuki!

Leaving~ now to hang out with the Love Bugs.

Love!

motherhood mystery #342

#342~ Love Bugs rejecting the food I've served them, throwing said food on the floor then proceeding to eat same said food once I've let them out and about.  Note to self: maybe serving food on the floor will enable Love Bugs to eat more?

little bits of me

There is something so sweet about my daughters' chubby hands.  I love to press down on their knuckles where the sweet chubbiness leaves a bit of an imprint.

I love to kiss their faces.  I love to tickle their nose with wispy strands of my already greying hair.  Their widening eyes as they track the path of a bird or a plane or fluff floating in the air.

I heard it said that children are your heart, running around outside of your body and I believe it.  These are my flesh, my bone, my dreams come true with breath of Life breathed into them and there is something so beautiful about their little noises.

We go in almost every night to look at them and sometimes they wake. Then we kick ourselves for disturbing their slumber and promise we won't do it again but the next night beckons, calls and teases us till we give in and go peek at them again.  We can't stand it.

I giggle and laugh on the ground looking at clouds. I snuggle and hold them tight to my body.  They're warm and soft and smell so sweet.  Sometimes they smell like the leftovers of lunch that they smushed in their hair but even that is so sweet.  It's tender.

They are tender. And they are mine.  My little hearts crawling, standing, daring to walk across to open arms.

My arms will always be open to welcome, to console, to hold these bits of me out here in the world.

Sweet tender little bits of me and my love that we just can't seem to get enough of their joyful existence.  They are His great gift to us and we rejoice!

After all, isn't that what my name means? And so I must do.

eating with spoons

Right now we're learning to eat with spoons...

Mommy said it would be hard but it wasn't that hard to do...

See? Not hard at all! I told my Mommy that we would do our very best and not spill anywhere.  I said, "Look, Mommy! This may be our first time but we're not going to resort to caveman like tactics.  We'll starve before we mess up our beautiful little bodies!"

Right Belle?

Belle?

Belle? What are you doing?

Hmmm... that kind of looks like fun! 

Well, like I said, we are just learning...

Look Li Li, I'm using my spoon too!

cute but not so

Awww... how cute!

The girls have started something recently that I find kind of cute even though I know I shouldn't.  When the girls don't like something we give them to eat they usually throw it off the side of their chairs onto the floor.  We can see it coming so we try to stop it by telling them firmly "no" and they, for the most part, understand it.

But for the past few days after we tell them "no" they've started raising their hands to their mouths, as if they are eating whatever they were about to discard, and then stuff it down by their laps.

Cute... but not really!

I know discipline is for the best because of what the Word says, for the Lord disciplines the one He loves (Hebrews 12:6a) but I think this is rather clever of the girls.  I probably shouldn't be too impressed, this may mean a lifetime of clever disobedience from these two but at least for now we "discipline" in a way that is appropriate.

Wow, development is such an amazing process!! I love watching these two grow and learning through their eyes as they discover life.

babies... er, little girls

It's hard to believe I've been a mother of twinkies for a whole year. The days at times did drag by (what? I'm just being honest) but then in a blink of an eye, they were no longer "newborns" or even babies for that matter.
I read an article that said babies become toddlers either when they start walking OR when they turn one.  The debate is still out on that one.  Either way, there is no use calling them babies anymore.  Especially now as they've started referring to other things as "babies"... and when I say "things" I do sincerely mean things. Just about anything can be a baby these days.
They love saying "mama" "dada" and "baby".  Belle loves making a "mmm" sound when we ask her what a cow says and yes, she still makes the "roaring" of a lion sound when we ask.  Li Li on the other hand loves to "spit" or stick her tongue out whenever we ask her anything.  So we've started asking her what an elephant says and it's just about spot on with how she sounds.
They are HAPPY babies and GOOD babies.  Oops, I mean little girls. They're wonderful and hilarious.  They LOVE playing peek-a-boo, their daddy, being read to and each other more than any other thing in the world.  They love peas, apple juice and chinese food (seriously!).  They're wonderful babies... er, I mean little girls.

We celebrated their birthday by going to the aquarium

and eating apple fritters

opening presents

eating cupcakes,

and of course a party in the park!

Yay for turning one!

the 4th (from a Love Bugs perspective)

We had a wonderful 4th of July. Despite the weather being yucky, we managed to have a full day of fun!

Our 4th of July "sparklers"

Even my baby carrier matched my red, white and blue outfit!

I think babies make the best accessories, don't you?!

Mommy's fun new dip. Thank you pinterest for leading her to this dip found here.

Even though she said we were too young this year to try some.

Playing

With Daddy

Enjoying the sunshine with Mommy

All in all, our first 4th was a huge hit! 

...and we even got to go to bed a little late. Woo hoo for breaking the bedtime routine!

an old camp secret

Did you go to summer camp? I did! I loved summer camp. Every year we'd drive and drive and drive until we reached the "Star" which was the sign on the road marking where to turn in to get to camp.  Since I started going to camp before I could read (compliments of begin a pastor's kid... and a camp going pastor no doubt!) I knew that star before I knew how to spell my own name.

Oh beloved camp!

What I took were friendships mostly but some lessons have stuck with me.

For instance, when swimming it's always good to have a "buddy"...

and other lessons and songs. Oh, the songs we used to sing around the campfire. I sang a lot of those songs when I was sleep deprived and trying to find some way to connect with God in the early days of my Love Bugs' lives.  I was clinging to the shred of hope and childlike faith that I remembered having at one point and singing songs from those days helped me.

Among the lessons I learned is a tool on prayer.

I learned this from my counselor and besides the camp songs being a favorite I deeply admired and loved my counselors. Oh, how i loved my counselors. When people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up "counselor" was in the top 3.  I never had any sisters growing up so camp counselors were my week of a glimpse into what having a teenaged sister was like. Man, did I love them! And man did they usually love my older brothers.

Ha! So I was naturally a favorite!

Anyway, I learned this from a camp counselor and have been doing it off and on ever since. Isn't that awesome?! I wish I remembered her name because I would tell her, "Look! You changed my life and helped me! Also, I'm sorry I made you share your bed when it was thundering! I'm sure you didn't get any sleep and were quite cranky that next day!"

First take a blank sheet of paper.  This one is a little smaller than I usually use but it's just to be used as an example anyway!

Then make lines.  I teeter between being a perfectionist and not.  So half my lines are straight and half are squiggly.  You can free hand this. No biggie!

go all the way down your sheet of paper...

then go the other way making a grid.

the top line is for the days of the week and I am terribly sorry for Wednesday because that is not a lot of room. at. all.

I bet you didn't know but the line right below the days of the week is a special line. Oo la la! So highlight it or use a marker or do something fancy to it. 

Then you add in names.

Now the top line of names that is special are the people or things that you want to pray for EVERY week.  Then below it are the people or things you want to pray for once in awhile.  So every Monday I pray for Hubs then I pray for whoever has the first line the first week, second line second week, etc.

Make sense?

I didn't finish filling this out because I already have mine made and while it's not totally private it's also not something I'd share willy nilly on the internet.  So if you want to see what a filled out one looks like, let me know and I'll email you a picture. Seriously, though, it's a bunch of names all the way down.

The thing I like about this is that it helps me stay pretty consistent with prayer.  The thing I don't like about it is I don't always remember to pray for things that come up suddenly. BUT you could have a day of the week where you pray for "current" needs for family, friends and yourself.

I might need to add a "current" square to my prayer sheet.

There you have it.

A lesson learned (among many) from my camp days!

real people live here

All I could think of when I saw this nectarine was, "this is some real fruit".  And I couldn't help but appreciate the fruit from farmers markets.  It's flawed, its dented, it looks kind of gross but it's real. It's not manufactured or grown in a factory field.  It's real.

And that's how I want my home to be. Real.  We're gonna make mistakes, we're gonna let our kids climb trees only to have them fall out and break their arms. I'm gonna say things and forget to hold my tongue.  I'm gonna "dent" Hubs and he's gonna "dent" me.  My kids will fight (darn) and I'm gonna lose my patience.  We're gonna look at each other and realize that we're bruised, dented, gross looking fruit.  I'll probably think Hubs and my Love Bugs are more dented than me... but that's the plank in my eye talking.

I wish I could avoid all of this but we're human and humans make mistakes.

I tend to be one of those humans who makes many mistakes and very blatantly because I'm so "over-the-top" loud and expressive.  I remember in college thinking that it must be so nice to sin "in quiet" instead of how I usually sinned... right out there in front of everyone.  Now I sin "in quiet" and I realize its just as bad if not worse... because there is no accountability should I choose not to ask for it.

So I saw this fruit, realized how perfectly delicious it was despite its appearance and realized that I want my home to be a place where "real people live"... meaning that our home has to be a home to grace and love... we have to know that dents and bruises *will* happen but God still wants to use us and love us despite our nasty appearances.  My home is a home where dents can be forgiven and healed, where bruises are given a rest and long deep breaths are taken.  I don't want some manufactured home with people who seem like they have it all together.  I want a place where we are free to make mistakes and then pick each other back up and keep trekking together.

My home has to be a real place for real people... cause if it's not it ain't gonna work.

real business

"The real business of your life as a saved soul is intercessory prayer.  Wherever God puts you in circumstances, pray immediately, pray that His Atonement may be realized in others lives as it has been in yours.  Pray for your friends now; pray for those with whom you come in contact with now."

Oswald Chambers "My Utmost for His Highest (June 20)"

Too often I get confused by my "real business"... what is my job, my passion, my direction in life?  And too often my business becomes about doing and convincing and pushing.... and not allowing and abiding.  Hardly anyone likes to sit and just let life happen.

We worry that should we sit too long we'll never find the motivation to leave our plush seats.  Soon we'll find that we have taken on the characteristics of the comfy chairs we have sat in. We become plush and comfy and inactive just like our chairs.

So the pendulum swings the other way and we reject the comfy chair and we get busy doing life.  We do life at fast pace.  We "catch" our breath when we sleep and we enjoy each other through social networks.  How often have I "caught up" with a good friend by looking at her pictures on Facebook? "Oh! You went to Europe? Looks like a great trip." I never even communicate to said friend I let my fingertips and eyeballs do the communicating while never actually inconveniencing myself.  Can't look at all the pictures? No problem, I'll just pick and choose what happens to be easiest for me.

So we're in a bind.  Either we become comfy couches snuggled under our blankets of "relaxing" or we become a social piranhas with 700 friends and no one near to talk to.

Don't get me wrong, I like relaxing.  I consider 7:05PM "my time" after the Love Bugs have gone to bed and 99% of the time end up on the couch.  It's wonderful and restful.  Sometimes "my time" ends up connecting with long distance friends through Facebook.  Now that my friends are having babies and working full time hours, I feel guilty calling late at night because of the time differences.  So hear me out, I like relaxing and I like Facebook, Pinterest, etc.

But what I really like were Oswald's thoughts above because it struck me as the perfect chord played in a harmony of connecting & abiding.  When we stop to pray for someone we are connecting with them in a higher sense than we could ever hope to connect via Facebook.  A true test of friendship is whether I am willing to get on my knees and offer up prayer on behalf of that person.

It's also abiding in the Lord because we are talking to Him and hearing from Him. Too often I take to the Lord my issues and then sign off and get on my way.  But I need to learn to hear from God.  I've heard it said that you can hear from God in the midst of chaos.  Which is good because my life can be chaotic.  As I write this I stare at the mess of a lifetime mocking me from behind.  I literally step-slid in avocado chunks to get to the computer to write this. Lord, speak to me in the chaos!

Now, don't take that as your excuse to make your life chaotic but take heart if you can't help but feel like you're treading water in life right now.  When God gives you slow seasons, take them, wallow in them, enjoy them... sit at a coffeeshop and read. read. READ. But then when God gives you busy seasons and messy avocado seasons, enjoy those and as you're tiptoeing around the crazy mess you call life still ABIDE. Pray and give thanks!  The cool thing about praying is that it can be done anywhere at anytime by anyone. Awesome! Changing diapers? Pray! Alone with the Word at a coffeeshop? Pray! Listening to screaming kids? Pray! Lunch with a friend? Pray!

Wherever you are in life, don't underestimate the ability of prayer. 

"do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God" Philippians 4:6

"be constant in prayer" Romans 12:12

"pray without ceasing" 1 Thessalonians 5:17