mood swing

Today I had one of the best days I have had in a long time. This weekend was just a fun time to be alone and be adventurous. I ventured out to the grocery store and Target all by myself (Target is no small feat my friends, I have to take the interstate *gasp*).

Today I was feeling pretty good. The cooler weather brightened my day. I got to wear comfy shoes and long pants (as opposed to the shorts I was sportin' a week ago). I worked out (hooray!), hung out with my Japanese friend who took my to Japan/America exchange night and I even spoke Japanese (sugoshii) and listening to Japanese was beautiful and... and I just had a good night.

But then I started thinking about Japan... and my mood crashed. Seriously crashed. It was the oddest thing. I was bawling at one point.... what is up?

I know that I'm supposed to be grieving and processing and changing and all that... but the sudden mood change was interesting tonight.

I'm in an okay mood now but I just feel sad.... again.

Mikey, poor Mikey~ he told me about this analogy of a tree and how it got cut down, but the stump was there and even though the person planted around it new flowers and plants, the stump was always still there.

I like my stump. But I miss my tree.