Pretty Pretty Princess!

Happy New Years Everyone!!!

Holly and I celebrated with a couple hands of "phase ten" and a couple rounds of "pretty pretty Princess"!! I got the black ring in the first game, BUMMER!! But won anyway!!
Just wanted to wish you all a very Happy New Years!!

Three things

Coming back from Karuizawa, Holly, Kyle, and I played "hot seat" the car version.
For those of you who don't know the game "hot seat" let me explain. One person sits in a seat and has about five minutes to answer any question that the other members of the group ask. It's a great way to get to know someone. The car version game is different because instead of one person being in the hot seat, everyone is. Everyone asks one question, you go around and everyone answers it, and then the next person answers. And so on and so forth.

Kyle asked the question, "What are three things you have learned from your father?" And so I wanted to let my father know (and whoever else) what my answer was. (and then follow that with my own answer of what my mother has taught me)
1. My love of bike riding or being active. My Dad climbed Long's Peak about 27 years ago and then ago on his 25 anniversary he climbed it with three of his children. Talk about being adventurous! He loves to exercise and challenge himself. I love that my father does not "act his age" but continues to be young in both body and spirit. :)
2. The ability to study the Word continuously through life, over a long period of time, and continue to be a learner. My father, who is a pastor, has studied God's Word profusely through his Christian life... over 30 years. He never tires of reading it, never tires of learning from it, and never tires of sharing what God is doing. He has remained flexible through life, allowing God to bend and stretch him as time passes.
3. My love for people. My father could have a conversation with a brick wall, if it meant he got to share about Jesus. My Dad can relate himself to people with long hair, multiple piercings, and tattoos while he himself has none(piercings and tattoos, he still has hair;) ). He can talk to you over a cup of coffee, late in the night or early in the morning. My Dad longs to give his life away and does so. My Dad is quick to say hello to people as he walks down the street.

Three things I learned from my mother:
1. The importance in telling the Truth. My mother and I had a rough patch of time when I found it easier to deceive her then to disappoint her. However, she taught me that honesty is the best way to be with people and that the "Truth will set you free"
2. The importance of being lady-like. Oh, Mom~ how I wish I were better at being a lady and not so much like my brothers. :) But I value the lady-like qualities I do possess and long for the Lord to make me into a gentle woman, like my mother.
3. Even when life doesn't make sense, God is still doing something. To make a long story short, there are questions we all have in life~ and my mother has taught me that even when God doesn't make sense, He is still working in our lives and doing something better than we could imagine. My mother has patiently and prayerfully clung to the Lord and lifted all of us children (and my sister-in-laws) up to the Lord.

If you are wondering why I am doing this~ you should know that I wouldn't be who and where I am today if not for my parents. My parents patiently loved and supported me through my years... Thank you Mom and Dad for loving me and "giving me away".

Dare to hope...

I've been thinking a lot lately about hopes and dreams... I have hopes. I have dreams. Sometimes I say them out loud... I say, "I dream of one day being able to climb all the 14-ers in Colorado!" or I say, "I hope to make an impact for God's kingdom till the day I die." And while those are good dreams and hopes those are not my deepest heart's hopes and dreams.

My college pastor, once spoke on a passage from 2 Kings 4 (beginning verse 8). It is the story of the Shunnamite woman who takes in Elisha and gives him a room in her home whenever he passes through town. Elisha is touched by this kind act and asks the woman, "You have gone to all this trouble for us. What can be done for you?" And the woman replies that she is fine with a home among her own people.

This sounds decent except the woman has a secret wish, she has a deep desire to have a child of her own. So why doesn't she say this? She's obviously spent time with Elisha and knew he was able to do so much through the Lord... and if someone asked you, "Anything you desire, anything I can do for you, what do you dream for?" Would you say, "Oh, I'm fine like this!" Except this woman's reply runs so closely to my own. There are deep dreams and wishes I pray for and think of often. But it is hard for me to say them out loud...

However, the servant replies for her, "She has no son, and her husband is old." So Elisha calls forth the woman and says, "About this time next year, you will hold a son in your arms." YIPEE!! ...yet, not her reaction. The Shunnamite's reaction is almost horror... "No, my lord. Don't mislead your servant, O man of God." I imagine her thinking two things. First, "Who told?" and second, "Don't hope for it!"

Yet, if she were like me, even deeper her heart would be thinking, "Oh, yes please!" I don't know if this is how it is with men... but I know for myself, as a woman, I like to think I am "keeping secrets". I like to keep my deepest desires and hopes to myself. For in MY mind I think, "If I don't wish for them or say them out loud... I can't be disappointed."

Yet, God has already given me these desires and has already seen them. It is no surprise to Him. So do I cling to these or do I open my heart of hearts to Him who created me so that I can truly be known. There is risk in letting out your hopes and dreams... the story of the Shunnamite doesn't end with her having a son. Her son grows and when he is a boy, he dies. The woman comes to Elisha and asks, "Didn't I tell you not to stir up my hope?" But Elisha is able to perform a miracle and restore her son. A moment to decide, do I love the Lord or do I love His gifts?

For me, my hopes and desires are just the toppings on a sundae (bare with me). My salvation and where God has led me (to Japan for Him? Whoa!) are already more than I deserve. I desire Him most of all. But those other things, that whisper to me, those are still there. I must decide. Am I going to ask for such things and hope and dream of something big like "a son" or will I just settle for the scraps of life, which are "safer"? It is true that asking for something your heart totally longs for puts you in a position where you allow God to give you what is best. If you say it out loud and don't necessarily receive it, will you be disappointed or will you confidently see that the Lord is all that can ever satisfy us?!

I want to be bold in my prayers. I want all of God and I want God to have all of me. If I say my dreams out loud... if I bare my soul before the Lord (who already knows it) I want to know that He alone fills me and satisfies my heart.

Wow, just some thoughts for today as I dream and pray for my life... and for the people here.

SUSHI!!!

Um, yum!! I love sushi. This is at dinner with our neighbors, Junkosan and her husband.
We had a blast and ate like Queens... how do Queens eat? If it's daintily than that doesn't work. Let's say Holly and I, if we were squirrels, would have eaten enough to keep us warm for winter. HA HA!! It was very traditional Japanese and VERY delicious.
mmm sushi!!

The street where you live...

"I have often walked down this street before... knowing I'm on the street where you live..." I love that song and now you too, my friends, can "be on my street". This is the house where I live and the street I live on.



















This is a picture of me studying. Holly, my college roommate of two years, wanted to take it because she knows studying is not a passion of mine. But since it is a language I am interested in (and a culture) it is much more fun to study then microbiology. Ha ha!! I am also sitting in front of the missionaries heaters because Holls and I don't have one of these. So we "store up" heat before venturing home. :)

Pictures galore...

This is Holly and I at the Tama Center. It's like a shopping center. They decorated for Christmas.


Sorry it's so dark but you can make out their Christmas decorations and it is SO beautiful. It's about a twenty minute combination of a walk and a train ride. Here in Tama Center is where I grocery shop. TC also offers a lot of "foreign" options~ the predictable McDonalds, Wendys, Subway is new there, and Starbucks. Which is where the third picture was taken. You can imagine it didn't take me long to find Starbucks. :)

The wait is over...

This is my room (before Holly). This is where I sleep.

It's called a futon. The sliding door by my dresser leads to the living room and the sliding door by my "desk" leads to the outside. Every morning around 6:30AM the sun comes up BRIGHT through those shades. Sweet huh?

Culture Shock...

I am a baby...
I am having to relearn things.
I was told this by many people during my training and I thought, "I can learn things" but nothing could have prepared me for how inadequate I feel.

It is good.

But yesterday, I had my first real "cultural shock". I have been trying to go to the post office for over a week now. But was going to wait until a student could take me "and teach me" how to ask for stamps, etc.

However, I decided, I will go alone and learn by myself. This will be good.

But it was closed, I looked at my watch, 12:30PM. Must be lunch. However, even after I came back another time (2:30PM) it was still closed.

And for some reason, I let this defeat me and ruin my day. I thought, "Even if there was sign that said, 'gone for five minutes' or 'emperor's birthday holiday' I can't read it. I am not only relearning, I am being stretched BY A POST OFFICE!"

And although this is funny and today I can laugh. I got home and cried. I felt so defeated and so sorry for myself. It was not good.

But today I got up and had my quiet time (did I fail to mention I didn't have one on the "post office day"?) and I read Revelations 1-3 and Galations. Several times I read, "Enduring patiently" and I thought, "am I enduring patiently or am I demanding comfort and knowledge now?" This trial of a new country, though it is hard... is not too hard.

I will not let the enemy defeat me and discourage me. I have the Lord on my side who permits and allows things to refine me. :) Someday I will read this blog and laugh, saying, "I just went to the post office" but even if I never fully learn Japanese and even if I continue to stumble around, I will remember that I am not of this world. I will embrace being an alien. :)

I wonder what "culture shock" Jesus had (if any) when He came to Earth as a baby. Is it too much to ask that I humble myself and take the place of a learner/servant instead of a "know-it-all"... I want to embrace these difficulties so that I may say that because of these I was better able to understand His word.

Thank you Jesus for coming to this earth, and taking the form of a baby, where you depended on many (even to change your diapers!! whoa!) and never complained or cried because you were humbled. Thank you Jesus that your mercies are new every morning. Thank you Jesus for these opportunities to become more like you. Great is YOUR faithfulness!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

My dear Mr. Jordan David Schupbach,

I regret to inform you that one, Miss Joanna Kay Schupbach (or as you affectionately nicknamed her as a child, Beaner), will be unable to submit to your demands for a picture showing of her time in Japan at this time.
She has fallen, unfortunately, to a grave situation where every time she attempts to connect to the world wide web her computer requests a password from her. A password which is secret to her. This is a terrible incident for Miss Schupbach and for yourself as she has many a wonderful photographs on her digital camera, just waiting for the opportunity to arise to be uploaded and sent. Since her computer is unable to connect to the computer, it is true that she no longer has access to SKYPE her phone service.
This challenges and frustrates Miss Schupbach at times for she wishes she were able to communicate more freely. But it also allows her more freedom in time that she should devote to language training and friendship development.
Fortunately good Sir Mark Rood and his family have given her permission to use their computer. But she doesn't feel at liberty to download her pictures here. Only to check the status of her inbox.
Please feel the sincerity and warmth of her apology for not being able to share with you her life, here in Hachioji at this time.
Thank you kindly,
with much fondness,
her personal assistant Helga Snotgrass!

I get very excited about the smallest of things...

Here it is my friends... my very first Japanese cell phone. Cool huh? Yeah, I know... it's very pink. But Jack Hayes (age 4) helped me pick it out.
Sweet huh? Anyway, I can do all sorts of things on my phone. I can watch t.v. and listen to FM radio... all these beautiful features (for cheap) that I will probably never use. But it's grand to have this phone. Yes, it gives instructions in english but it is going to be CHALLENGING TO USE~ no doubt.
So wish me luck....

First Thoughts

This is a more serious entry but I promise pictures of Japan, and myself along with my "crazy" adventures will follow.
My parents wrote me a card and gave it to me for when I was on the plane. It was probably the sweetest card I had ever received from them. The following is a verse my father gave me and my reaction to it (journal entry from the plane).

*Jesus began to announce The Good News concerning the Kingdom of God. He took His disciples with Him, along with some women He had healed... Among them... Joanna* Luke 8:1-3

My goodness Lord- what powerful words You have given me through Your word. WOW Lord! Thank you for healing me! And not just from my life before You but from the wrongs I did yesterday, and the wrongs I'll do tomorrow! Truly You are my Redeemer! My "Hosea"~ even though I know that's a picture of You love for Your people. LORD, You have made my dream to serve You come true! My heart soars on eagles wings... and I am thrilled. How You have found pleasure and delight in me is only because of Jesus! Lord, truly... I am Your creation! Joanna means "God's Gift"~ LORD let that be true! Let my gift be Your Good News! Let me live with such fierce passion for You the trees quake and mountains bow down. At Your Name, At Your power!
LORD, the same healing You gave to me and so many I know~ LORD, give that healing to the students I will encounter. Jesus bring the healing You speak of in Isaiah 60:1-2
*The Spirit of the LORD God is upon Me, becasue the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn*

Take a deep breath...

Breathe in, breathe out....
That's all I can think of as I sit here tonight. It's late and I am tired but my mind is reeling and I don't want this moment to slip away from me tonight. All along I keep saying, "It hasn't hit me yet. It hasn't hit me yet." And although everyone around me is wishing me the best of luck and "sending me off"~ I've managed to keep my composure.

But as my parents sleep and as I sit here in my family room... a small stirring in my heart awakens and I feel a small tug. Maybe it's because my cousin Josiah was over tonight and we watched "Family Christmas 1987"~ which, okay, I'll admit wasn't the smartest thing for me to do at this time. Maybe it's because I opened my Christmas gifts and realize it's not even halfway through December...

Whatever it is... the feeling of time passing, the amount of errands piled high on my list, or the phone calls that never cease because people are calling to make that last comment or well-wishings... it has hit me tonight.

I am moving away. I don't feel like this should be a big deal because I survived the transition to college. But it does.

I feel like I'm not being brave... part of me says, "Give it up! It's not a big deal, it's only two years."

But there is another voice that says, "It's okay to cry. It's okay to be sad."

I want to be brave and I want to be strong... and I'm NOT saying that crying is weak. I just don't want to make a big deal out of this. So many missionaries have gone before me. I read all about Adoniram Judson's life and I feel "unworthy" to be considered a missionary. He went, knowing that he probably would never see his family again. When he boarded the ship he said goodbye until Heaven. So I feel awkward crying for two years.

Is that selfish of me? It doesn't make sense does it?
Sorry this blog is... random!

This entry is dedicated to one gal who has helped me grow (leaps and bounds) in beauty. When I met Miss Hatcher, we were preparing to leave for a summer missions trip to Japan in 2003.

I remember thinking that Amy was lady-like and a gentle soul. I knew from the first minute I met her, that we would be friends and that I would learn from her.
I have so many good memories of Amy... where to start? Rice fields and Mt. Fuji? Laughter in Lighthouse? Getting massages from chairs that just shook us... Amy is quick to laugh at my jokes and make me feel like the world's best story-teller (though that is not often true). Amy is a beautiful woman, with a heart of gold that longs to serve the Lord. She has been my listening ear, my shoulder to lean on, and my laughter for two and a half years. She has been quick to send me a funny card, text me a message of encouragement, or send me some of her beauty.
Amy has gentle pushed me into expressing more of my femininity, through everything from my heart's tenderness to the way I dress... Amy would never let me settle for jeans and t-shirts. Ha ha! Amy has been quick to go to the Lord and to the Word. She has shared heartache and joys with me.
The flowers above are from Amy. Since she could not be a part of my farewell party tonight she sent some of her beauty in the form of flowers.
Amy, they are gorgeous~ I don't think I have EVER received flowers more beautiful! They smell AMAZING!! And I didn't know if you knew what they looked like so I wanted to share them with you... sorry I have yet to figure out how to blog a "smell". I will miss our daily text messages, sometimes about nothing but wanting to say "hi".
Thank you for your beauty and for your friendship. You are the kind of friend dreams are dreamed for.
I will miss your laughter (can you tape record it so when I tell a bad story I can hit play and hear you laughing?) and will miss our talks. But I am honored to have known you and know that our friendship, with God as our center, can not be threatened by time and distance.
You are in my prayers.
(p.s. look at how they spelled gambate :) )

Good news

P.S. On a lighter note~ I found a "change" on my settings where anyone (with/without blogs) can comment on my pages... I know a couple of people (Mom and Amy Noxon for example) said they would have commented, if they had a blog.
So... yay!

Stars...

I've always been fascinated by the stars... from my days of living as a young girl in the country and being able to count all the stars (or trying to) I've loved looking up at them and just thinking of God's amazing hand upon my life.

I was thinking that tonight as I drove home from Kalamazoo... I finished my last roadtrip for now and have finished all my long-distance goodbyes. Starting tomorrow friends and family will trickle into my small home to wish me good luck, say a prayer, and bid me farewell as I travel to Japan.

The stars were out tonight, not as bright as they shine in a country sky but I could see some of the constellations and was in deep thought as I looked at them (while not taking my eyes off the road). I thought of the verses in Job 38 where God is answering Job, when he questions God's hand upon his life.

God says, *"Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone- while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?* (verses 4-7)

I think of how God has been faithful to create and to work in my life, not to mention all around me. I think of how I can't always see too far ahead of me, but how God has always been faithful to guide me and lead me. I may not always understand or even know what God is doing specifically in my life, but I know that His best is what I desire.

I also thought of the verses in Philippians 2 *Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.* (verses 14-16)

As fascinated as I have been with the stars, I want to devote that energy to the Lord and I want to be fascinated with Him and what He is doing. I want to do things without complaint and without arguing... I want to become blameless and pure so that I can shine like a star in a crooked and depraved world...

Lord, thank you that this is not as good as "joanna" gets. Thank you that You are continually doing a work in me. Thank You that You will not give up on me, You will not quit the work of my life until it has been brought to completion. Thank you for being You and thank You for the opportunities You have laid before me. I pray that I would shine You and live each day pursuing You, Lord. I trust in You and trust in what Your hand will do with my life...

Faith

My heart is "restless" tonight... I can't quite put into words what I am feeling but I thought immediatly of Hebrews 11. Although I am scared of my unknown, I feel that what these verses say will bring some comfort so that I can sleep tonight.
*And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him... By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going... For he was looking foreward to the city that has foundations, whose designer and builder is God.* Hebrews 11:6,8,10

Words that heal...

*Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For behold, those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge, that I may tell of all your works.* Psalm 73:23-28

*Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. God, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer's; he makes me tread on my high places.* Habakkuk 3:17-19

*And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, "This is the way, walk in it," when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.* Isaiah 30:21